Time To Play...

Spot the Mikie!

It's the hottest sensation that's sweeping the nation! In the following photos, you will find a school photo of your humble poster-boy. Your job is to try and Spot the Mikie amongst the other children. Do you understand the rules? OKAY... Let's go!!















Photo 1: Kindergarten '64, Regency Acres in Aurora, Ont. Where's Mikie?











#2: Grade 1 '65. To improve the odds, there are actually two children named Michael Jones in this pic. Can you find both Mikies?















Now we move to Central Public School in Brampton, Ont. for Grade 2-3 In Canada's Centennial year with the lovely Miss Stroud. Hard to believe she never got married.













The next picture was Grade 4 whose teacher was Mrs. Ricketts (nee Hansen), quite the knockout!


















More of a challenge for you is Grade 5 since our school was too cheap to spring for colour that year. A hint is that Mikie has a Superman-curl thing going.













Check out those funky hairdos happening for Grade 6. This is where Mikie began to excel at the Shortest Kid in the Class competition.














Grade 7 at Central Public School was an unmemorable year. Sorry, no choice anecdotes, except that it's the final year for CPS.














Grade 8 was Mikie's only year at Agnes Taylor before High School. Also 1st row, far left was Laurie L*gg*, Mikie's first crush and subsequent humiliation. No bitterness held, but she did get Mono and was never seen again.

How did YOU score?

Who loves ya baby?

Obviously this guy hasn't learned to embrace his inner bald man. One of my spies in Tokyo found this pic for me and the poor guy either needs to get a stronger toupee adhesive or to stop getting so hammered on cheap Japanese whiskey.

Here is a man who knows what it is to be bald and beautiful. (Alas, I am cursed with a full head of hair, albeit a graying head.)

Afternoon of Remembrance.

Today in Hollywood, there will be a memorial service for all those greats of animation who have passed on in the past year. There's many names I don't recognize up for tribute, but I have mentioned a few of them, mainly: Joe Barbera, Alex Toth and Iwao Takamoto.

"Oni wa soto! Fuku wa uchi!"

鬼は外! 福は内! is a phrase shouted throughout the land in order to cleanse one's house of demons. Setsubun (節分) is an annual festival held on Feb. 3rd to celebrate Lunar New Year's Eve. (It corresponds in time to yesterday's post on Groundhog's day which is also celebrated as Candlemas or the halfway point between Winter and Spring.) Families gather round the front of their residence and shout, "鬼は外! 福は内!" while the male head of the household dons his 鬼 (oni) mask while scattering roasted beans or unshelled peanuts (豆まき=mame-make or bean-scattering ceremony).




Here in Sendai, it's traditional to eat a long uncut 巻き鮨 (maki-zushi rolled up sushi) and this year it is quite fortuitous if you stand facing a North-North-Westerly direction while doing so.



In rural areas, look out for a rather gruesome custom, which is to eat grilled sardines and stick the heads on sticks with holly outside your front door to frighten away any demons trying to enter. (Mmmm. fish heads!)

Watchtower time.

I'm watching the NHL All-Star game (actually playing bridge on my pc while it blares in the background...nice uniforms, not much substance), when my inattentiveness was interrupted by my ringing doorbell. This can only be (a) NHK looking to collect their fee which no one in Japan pays, (b) some old guy selling subscriptions to various all-nihongo newspapers or (c) the Jehovah Witness flogging their path to enlightenment. (c) won the draw this morning and, as usual, it's one really nice-looking babe and one minger (less than attractive babe). They tried to sell their wares in their broken but well-intentioned English, but one time I should invite them in to my Den of Iniquity, which should scare them off and maybe I'll get put on some "Beware of the Crazy Gaijin" list.

Let It Snow!

This morning, I woke up to the fluffy stuff coming down in droves. I decided to ditch the bike routine and walk to school (it looked a little slippery) and clicked these two pics of the school before entering those hallowed walls of learning.






Tomorrow there will be a famous Japanese ritual carried out to prevent demons from entering your home (wait until tomorrow for the post.) So I decided to perform a famous Canadian ritual, it may not prevent demons, but it does look angelic.

How Much Ground...

How much ground could a groundhog grind if a groundhog could grind ground?

Happy Groundhog's Day to my North American buddies. I hope Wiarton Willy is good to you and he doesn't see his shadow. It's snowing pretty heavily over here, so the prospects of shadow-boxing are slim which means a short winter for us!

I Wish I Were an OSCAR Meyer Winner.

Now that the frenzy of National Gorilla Suit Day has died down and since we're in the middle of Admissions testing AND I have all my work done, it's time for a little post I'd like to call:

MY OSCAR PICKS & PREDICTIONS (including any Japanese or Canadian connections.)












First up, the Host: Ellen Degenerate (ooh, you know this will be snide when someone calls her that!) Don't really like her. Saw her backstage at some awards show a few years ago and found her to be extremely un-funny. But she does have a popular Day-time talk show and others seem to find her amusing, so I'll give her the benefit of the doubt. Prediction: several lame jokes about the Trump-Rosie feud. Oh, and maybe (just maybe) there'll be a joke about speeches going on too long!

Best Motion Picture of the Year

First we have Babel. Haven't seen it and don’t know much about it. But it has goats, many different settings and, from what I’ve heard, a startling performance by Rinko Kikuchi. It’s up for 7 nominations, so I’m sure it’ll win something...I’m hoping it's Rinko for Supporting Actress. It won the Golden Globe (GGs) for Best Drama and it gets an extra point on my likeability meter for having a character named “Mike Jones” in it.

Next up is The Departed. Scorcese's latest gangsta flick is a remake of the HK flick, Infernal Affairs (which is a great title...the “Departed” refers to Catholics who spend time in Purgatory, sort of lost on all us Protestant boys & girls.) Nice cast, Leo, Matt, Jack & Mark plus several Sopranos rejects. I hope to see it tonight and maybe my enthusiasm will be increased threefold for it, but Best Picture...nah. But they'd better emulate the GGs and give the Director nod to Marty before he starts doing Family films.

Letters from Iwo Jima is my personal pick for best pic. I’ve commented on it before, and suffice to say, I loved it. Good acting, cinematography, sound, FX, etc., not a snoozing moment throughout. Could have used a few more wacky Japanese jokes. The best running gag is about the Sergeant who couldn't blow himself up.


I saw Little Miss Sunshine on the plane and it had shocked the heck out of me that I'd enjoy it so much. I don't think it ever came to theaters over here and if it did, it disappeared quickly. I suspect the Japanese title will be renamed “Little Miss Fattie”. I liked Arkin and the dad, Kinnear, but the daughter was outstanding. She's nominated for Best Supporting but should be up for Best Actress.




And finally, The Queen. I thought it might be a biopic for Scott Thompson, but it appears to be about some Majesty they have over in England. I like Frears as a director and Helen Mirren and James Cromwell are swell actors, but I think this one has too much competition to win. If it does scrape out a win, it'll probably be released here, otherwise it'll be Arthouse fare in a tiny Shibuya theater. (Remind me to give you a Princess Di anecdote sometime.)

つづく (to be continued...)

Even Godzilla's Getting Into the Act.

One of the few times where Godzilla lost a match. He knows better than to mock the sanctity of NGSD!














Sergio Aragones of MAD fame knows the importance of NGSD.


















So does Mike Peters of Mother Goose and Grimm fame. (More cartoons at: MG&G)



So why don't you put on your costume?

Gorilla my dreams.

Well, it's finally here, so break your Gorilla Suit out of the mothballs, put it on and go on a walkabout. Unfortunately, today is the day when all these Junior High kids take the entrance exam in order to enter our hallowed walls of learning, so my vice-principal won't let me wear my Gorilla Suit to school. But as soon as I get home, I'll go door-to-door frightening the neighbours.

Go for it, you know you want to...Go APE!

What 1953 Film Noir was Marilyn in?

I needed an excuse to post more photos, so get those scrolling fingers ready, here come some more boring pictures!






































The answer is "Niagara."

DA DA DA DAAA DAAA DAAA DA!

YOU ARE SPIDER-MAN!!


You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.

---

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

Happy Birthday to Yuko and Mera(!)

Yuko Saito, spouse of DJ Mark Saito, celebrates her birthday today. But so does Mera (Aquaman's wife)...hmmmmm. Could there be a connection? They both like deep sea diving, they like to talk to fish and I've never seen them in the same room together! That's it-Yuko IS Mera. Yes, you heard it here first!


And if you need any bigger clue, does not this picture of Aqualad look a lot like her husband, Mark? (But marrying Aqualad...Ewww!)

The Battle of Stoney Creek...

It was a battle fought on June 6, 1813, during the War of 1812 near Stoney Creek, Ontario. British units made a night attack on an American encampment. Although the British were repulsed, the American force subsequently withdrew. This battle is re-enacted annually by American and Canadian "troops" in June.



I went to Stoney Creek to visit an old high school buddy. These shots were taken from his mom's condo. I didn't go to any re-enactment of any battles, but we did leave a few dead soldiers behind (also known as emptied beer bottles.)

Phil is a physicist turned folk musician. If you want to hear some of his stuff, check out: Pip (don't bother.)




















If you squint real hard, you can see the CN tower in Toronto. (Click on the picture to enlarge it.)

Sloooowly I turned...

As all Stoogeophiles know, this is the line from a Stooges' sketch uttered by Moe & Larry, who upon hearing the term "Niagara Falls" are triggered into a berserker rage against the beleaguered Curly. I went there late last December and I must admit that I did not succumb to the frenzy. It was a cold rainy day and I wandered around for an hour or two and I enjoyed it immensely. I'm not one for doing the sightseeing gig solo (I desperately need human interaction in order to make sarcastic comments or to mutter snide remarks about the locals), but here I was in the Honeymoon capital, taking in the sights. I was undergoing some JTs (like DTs, only you need a fix of Japanese, not booze) so I managed to smugly refrain, "どうぞ douzo" to a couple wanting to exit the souvenir shop as I held the door for them and I took a photo of two giggly teeny-boppers who I offered, "一緒で isshou de" in order to snap them together. I got my dose of Japanese and I made some Nipponese-types happy to hear their language.

So here are some photos of Niagara Falls. They look the same as any other photos of Niagara you've ever seen, but what do you want for nothing? (Rubber Biscuit?)





















































































And in case you were thought I was kidding about the Pavlovian effect "Niagara Falls" has on people, check this out:

James Brown...Sex Machine.

I was back in Canada during the demise of James, so I didn't really comment on his 6-foot under retirement. I was in Niagara and noted that he was due to play Casino-Niagara on New Year's and I was thinking how cool it would be to see him live. Now, it would just be cool to see him alive.

Over the years and via 4 marriages and an unknown amount of liaisons, he had 5 sons, three daughters, eight grandchildren and four great-grandchildren on record.

So, here is the Hardest-Working Man in Show Business, the Godfather of Soul performing this post's title track.



Now why am I bringing up James Brown a month after his death? Well, because there's a new term out there, coined by Japan's 71-year-old health minister Hakuo Yanagisawa, who called Japanese women "birth-giving machines" and called on them to "do their best per head."

"The number of women aged between 15 and 50 is fixed. Because the number of birth-giving machines and devices is fixed, all we can ask for is for them to do their best per head, although it may not be so appropriate to call them machines."

At least he was good enough to admit that calling women "machines" may not be appropriate. I'm trying to do my part to enlist women into their machine-role, but so far I can't even get a date.

A Blast From the Past.

I just came across this song that I'd written way back in my NOVA days in Tokyo. It applies to pretty much any cram school in the country. Enjoy...

Sung to the tune of: "Where Have All The Flowers Gone."
Where have all the flowers gone?
To window side-boxes.
Where has all the O2 gone?
It's become smog.
Where have all the lush parks gone?
They're closed on Mondays.
What about contagions?
Oh, just go and wear a mask.
Where have all the children gone?
To "Hello Kitty Land".
Where do they go to run and play?
In malls, of course.
When do they throw temper tantrums?
Whenever they feel like it.
When are they disciplined?
Never, for that's the school's job.
Where do all young lovers go?
Gone to Shibuya.
Where do they go to make out?
To Shinjuku.
Who are their movie idols?
J. Roberts, Brad-o Pitt-o.
Where are they afterwards?
Back home to study.
Where have all the housewives gone?
Gone to shopping.
In the malls, where do they go?
To buy clothes.
After work where do they go?
Home to cook and clean.
When do they ever bitch,
At Nova lessons, of course.
Where have all the husbands gone?
Gone to Pachinko.
On the weekends, where are they?
On the golf course.
After that, where do they go?
Off to love hotels, they go.
When do they ever sleep?
Well, that's what's the trains are for.
Where do Nova women go?
Off to Rappongi.
Where do Nova fellows go?
To go buy toys.
Where do Nova teachers sing?
At Karaoke.
When do they ever drink?
Whene'er and wherever.

My deepest darkest secrets...

...are finally ready for you to ponder, as I have updated my profile. (Big Deal)

Get Your Paws on Me, You Damn Stinking Human.

Bape, A Bathing Ape is a clothing line worn by trendsetters and though not officially associated with NGSD, I'd like to see it as an affiliate. Set your wayback machine to 1993 in Harajuku when designer, Nigo, began a line of clothes featuring the ape heads (primarily Cornelius) from Planet of the Apes on t-shirts. Jump forward to today and you'll find that they've blossomed into one of the largest manufacturers of hip gear.

Bape originally sold exclusively at company-owned Busy Works Shops and focused mostly on men's apparel like T-shirts and hoodies, but has now created Bathing Ape brands to cater to women and children. The women's lines, Apee and Bapy, is usually sold in Busy Works/Bape stores, or have stores next door. Bape Kids, the children's line, has its own store in Tokyo. A Bathing Ape has even extended beyond clothing to a hair salon (Bape Cuts), gallery (Bape Gallery), cafe (Bape Cafe), record label (Ape Sounds) and (B)apeTV. Check out their website at: Bape

Accept no substitutes! There are plenty of knock-off Bape wannabes that market their gear to the hip hop crowd, but don't fall for these posers (Fake-ape or Fapes). "To ape" may mean "to imitate" but in this case, it's just not cool.

If we can only convince the Bape guys to forego the t-shirts and go full on into providing rad-gorilla costumes, then everyone will be willing to participate in National Gorilla Suit Day. Ahhh, one can dream.