2007-12-02

My Left Foot.

Yesterday was cheap movie day (10 bucks, but take my word for it, that's cheap in Japan) so I biked over to the mall and feel I got my money worth with this movie called エクス‐クロス (ekusu-kurosu or X-Cross.) If Shakespeare wrote J-Horror, it'd be something like this movie.

Some young virgin goes to a remote village and while soothing herself in an onsen, gets kidnapped by a bunch of torch-wielding psychos with scythes. She gets crucified and then they lop off her left leg and worship it. That's the best I can figure out without really understanding the language.

Then our two heroines decide to travel to the same remote village and almost end up on the legless menu themselves. All of the villagers are pretty ugly and thus have an aversion to ケイタイ (keitais or cell phones) and cower when their picture is taken.

The wimpy protagonist, 水野しおり (Shiori Mizuno) is played by 松下奈緒 (Nao Matsushita) and spends a lot of the movie falling down, talking on her cell and getting saved.

The kick-ass protagonist 火請愛子 (Aiko Hiuke) who has a pretty good knowledge of household chemicals and chainsaws) is played by 鈴木亜美 (Ami Suzuki.) She is the spunkiest of the pair and holds her own against the crazed horde. She also sings one of the tunes with ALY & AJ (whoever the hell they are) called "Potential Breakup Song". After seeing her in this movie, my only advice is: Don't mess with Aiko!

Psycho killer,
レイか (Reika) loves to dress up in a cute pink dress and attempt to decapitate young lasses with two pair of giant scissors. Played by 小沢真珠 (Maju Ozawa) she is very effective as the creepy Edward Scissorhands-wannabe who invokes the onomatopoeiac phrase,
チョキ-チョキ (Choki-Choki which is a definitely more frightening than Snip-Snip.)

Technical support for the gals is provided by 橘弥生 (Yayoi Tachibana) who is played by another J-pop singer, 中川翔子Shoko Nakagawa and spends the movie on the phone and in front of a computer. Apparently in real life she's an avid Cos-player and aspiring otaku.

The first victim, 岩根あゆこ (Ayuko Iwane) spends her time bathing and waiting to be killed. She does have a brother though that helps our two gals.




There's also some guy named 池内博之 朝見圭一 
Ikeuchi Hiroyuki but he's not as cute as the others.

A tie-in to the movie are these cool looking pastries, delicious yet deadly. This little Illustration Gallery nicely sums up the movie in a nutshell.












If you're too lazy to click to the website, here's a trailer for you:

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